The neighborhood in which we now live consists mostly of Polish families and young hipsters. I feel that in order to fit in I either need to start dressing way better or learn Polish. Seeing as my 5 plus years of French never really stuck, I'm thinking that outfitting myself might be my best bet.
In an effort to pick up tips, I've been watching people in the subway and on the street, but I'm concerned that I just don't have it in me. I'm not saying that I dress horribly now; I would even say that I am able to pull myself together more times than not. It's just that the full-on hipster look seems complicated and layered and requires an ability to throw together seemingly random pieces while making it all look effortless and almost accidentally. I tend to find a good outfit and stick with it so that I have maybe 4 or 5 really good outfits to choose from, all of which pre-planned and fine-tuned down to the jewelry and attitude to accompany it.
The pre-planning of the thing adds further complication to the whole process since I can't pull off the effortlessness that these urban hipster seem to bathe in. When I wear one of my pre-constructed creations, I feel like I am just screaming, "This took me 2 days and 20 outfit changes to come up with - not including the countless advice and reassurance from friends and family!!"
Which of course bleeds into a whole other hurdle: I can barely ever dress myself. I mean, I have the actual mechanics of the process down (one leg into pants at a time, make-sure to align buttons before commencing buttoning and so on), it's the confidence in trusting that what I think looks good actually does that I'm missing. And I just can't imagine that the 20-somethings that I end up studying go through those same apprehensions before leaving the house ("Are you sure the crying-Indian-in-front-of-rainbow t-shirt with the Harry Potter scarf and army boots with leg-warmers comes off as ironic and not as a mentally-challenged 11-year-old?")
I had dyed part of my hair purple in hopes that would make up for just wearing jeans and a black sweater for the 12th day in a row, but having transplanted myself to the hipster mecca that is Brooklyn, I feel like I have to start working a little harder and start layering up the irony. Taking a look around my room at the frog rainboots, pink Hedwig the Owl hoodie, and frankenstein-hands gloves, though, makes me feel like I'm going to end up much closer to the 11-year-old end of things.
Maybe I should go ahead and order some Berlitz Polish tapes online.
11.26.2007
Even the Russian Judge Gave Me a 9.5
Part of the deal with me moving to New York was that I take over babysitting a three-year-old for my aunt since she will soon have a kid of her own on which to sit. The kid is totally awesome. He has also clearly learned already how to judge the help.
While giving him a bath the other day, he told me me, and I quote, "You really did an excellent job with rinsing my hair. I mean, you didn't get any soap in my eyes."
He then went on to score the rest of my bath-giving skillz by saying, "And the water temperature is perfect since it is not too cold or warm. Really it is just warm enough - very nice."
I feel pretty damned accomplished right now.
While giving him a bath the other day, he told me me, and I quote, "You really did an excellent job with rinsing my hair. I mean, you didn't get any soap in my eyes."
He then went on to score the rest of my bath-giving skillz by saying, "And the water temperature is perfect since it is not too cold or warm. Really it is just warm enough - very nice."
I feel pretty damned accomplished right now.
11.25.2007
I'm Going to Hell for this Post, I'm sure.
When we first moved into our sweet new apartment the only real downside was that our heat wasn't working. After a day or so the maintenance man and a radiator repairman showed up. They were both very nice, but only the radiator guy really spoke English. As they were packing up, he said to me, "“At least you’ll be warm tonight. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.”
“Thanks, you too!! Thank you so much,” I said.
Pause, pause, pause.
He then says to me, “You have a smile like superman.”
“Oh – uh, Thank you!”
“I mean, You could be his sister. Uh, what’s his name – uh, I can’t think of it – he died, right? Oh! Christopher Reeve. You look like him” (motioning to his face)
It took everything I had not to respond with, "So I look like I'm paraplegic?" But I bit my tongue and responded instead with, “Oh! Thanks. I mean, you guys are my supermen fixing my heat and everything.”
He then, literally looks me up and down and says, “I wouldn’t mind being your superman." Which he then quickly follows with, "I mean – no disrespect, miss.”
I kind of stumble through, “Oh, no – I mean, thanks!! You have a wonderful Thanksgiving!”
He reciprocates the sentiment and leaves.
Is it wrong that since he followed up his come-on with a quick, "I mean no disrespect" that I found it a bit charming? And in fairness to the Christopher Reeve comparison, I was breathing into a tube in order to move through the apartment at the time.
“Thanks, you too!! Thank you so much,” I said.
Pause, pause, pause.
He then says to me, “You have a smile like superman.”
“Oh – uh, Thank you!”
“I mean, You could be his sister. Uh, what’s his name – uh, I can’t think of it – he died, right? Oh! Christopher Reeve. You look like him” (motioning to his face)
It took everything I had not to respond with, "So I look like I'm paraplegic?" But I bit my tongue and responded instead with, “Oh! Thanks. I mean, you guys are my supermen fixing my heat and everything.”
He then, literally looks me up and down and says, “I wouldn’t mind being your superman." Which he then quickly follows with, "I mean – no disrespect, miss.”
I kind of stumble through, “Oh, no – I mean, thanks!! You have a wonderful Thanksgiving!”
He reciprocates the sentiment and leaves.
Is it wrong that since he followed up his come-on with a quick, "I mean no disrespect" that I found it a bit charming? And in fairness to the Christopher Reeve comparison, I was breathing into a tube in order to move through the apartment at the time.
11.20.2007
Chapter 5 & 6: Zombies Can't Solve All Our Problems & Success, the 2nd Time Around!
So, amazingly enough, I finally found a place to live! And it was totally easy this time around. When I first went back to St. Louis, I was waiting to hear back from a guy about a roommate situation in Park Slope, Brooklyn. I didn’t blog about it because I didn’t want to jinx it. However, in the end, he didn’t pick me anyway so it really didn’t matter. I was sure that I was going to get it since, when I first met him, he got totally stoked about the idea of living with a life-size animatronic zombie. He ended up narrowing it done to me and a couple of other people. He then interviewed me again over the phone when I was back in St. Louis. We talked for at least a half an hour in which time we discussed everything from my sleeping habits to my religious beliefs to my taste in music and film. I felt really good about the interview since he and I seemed to be on the same page with everything. So I was pretty let down when I got the email that he went with someone else. I beat myself up about it for a while trying to figure out where in the interview process I went wrong. Was listing Radiohead as one of my favorite bands too mainstream for this po-mo hipster? Did my mentioning that my cat happens to be fairly fat come off as too judgmental? Was I doomed when he said that he couldn’t live with someone who would sit around talking about angels and I didn’t then immediately say, “Yeah! Angels, who needs ‘em?”
Eventually I began to let it go. I focused on what would have been the downsides with living with him: Even though the building itself allowed dogs, he didn’t want to live with one so I would have been without Ralphie, at least, for a few months. One of the major draws of the place for me, other the sweet claw-foot bathtub, was that in the initial meeting he had made it sound as though he would be moving in a few months – thus leaving me the apartment so that I could bring up my little dog, but in the second interview he sounded a bit more settled-in. I wouldn’t be able to ask him for directions ever since when Liz and I went to see the place he gave told me to get off at completely the wrong station which landed us literally in the middle of some cops arresting a man but then it turned out that the “right” directions had us having to walk over 15 blocks when we could have simply taken a different train that would’ve landed us only 4 blocks from the apartment. And I would have to deal with his dumb name, which I won’t say here, but I’ll just say that it was totally dumb.
In the end, it all worked out for the better. As it turned out a friend of mine from college decided to move and so we started looking for a place together. She had recently helped her brother find a new place in the city and had found the whole process to be almost as bad as what I had gone through in my initial search so when I got back into town for us to start actually viewing places, we were both fairly discouraged. After being back in New York for two days, we went to see our first place. We entered into the whole thing with our expectations set very low, but when we walked up to the building, we were totally impressed. And even more impressed when we saw the actual apartment. Two days later, we were signing the contract.
The place is totally great. It’s the 3rd floor of a house that has now been converted into apartments. It’s a 2-bedroom, each with a door opening directly to the hallway (so that if we ever end up hating each other we can manage to pretty much completely avoid one another). It has a good-sized living room and separate kitchen and bathroom, hardwood floors and lots of closets. It also has plenty of windows (a couple with a semi-view of Manhattan and one of the major bridges). It is just steps from the subway and is surrounded by lots of restaurants and shops. For now, I can only have my cat. I say, “for now” because I am being optimistic that I will be able to talk them into letting me bring up Ralphie later since their only concern is for potential noise. (The ad said that small dogs were okay, but that apparently meant under 10 pounds, which my mutant beagle is not.)
So all in all, we totally win. My head has finally stopped spinning from how fast it all worked out so that I am now left only to figure out how to get all my stuff up here from the ol’ STL. And hopefully, next month I will be able to win them over with how attractive my dog is. I mean, could you say “No” to this?:
I do still long for that claw-foot tub though. Oh well – I guess you can’t have it all.
Eventually I began to let it go. I focused on what would have been the downsides with living with him: Even though the building itself allowed dogs, he didn’t want to live with one so I would have been without Ralphie, at least, for a few months. One of the major draws of the place for me, other the sweet claw-foot bathtub, was that in the initial meeting he had made it sound as though he would be moving in a few months – thus leaving me the apartment so that I could bring up my little dog, but in the second interview he sounded a bit more settled-in. I wouldn’t be able to ask him for directions ever since when Liz and I went to see the place he gave told me to get off at completely the wrong station which landed us literally in the middle of some cops arresting a man but then it turned out that the “right” directions had us having to walk over 15 blocks when we could have simply taken a different train that would’ve landed us only 4 blocks from the apartment. And I would have to deal with his dumb name, which I won’t say here, but I’ll just say that it was totally dumb.
In the end, it all worked out for the better. As it turned out a friend of mine from college decided to move and so we started looking for a place together. She had recently helped her brother find a new place in the city and had found the whole process to be almost as bad as what I had gone through in my initial search so when I got back into town for us to start actually viewing places, we were both fairly discouraged. After being back in New York for two days, we went to see our first place. We entered into the whole thing with our expectations set very low, but when we walked up to the building, we were totally impressed. And even more impressed when we saw the actual apartment. Two days later, we were signing the contract.
The place is totally great. It’s the 3rd floor of a house that has now been converted into apartments. It’s a 2-bedroom, each with a door opening directly to the hallway (so that if we ever end up hating each other we can manage to pretty much completely avoid one another). It has a good-sized living room and separate kitchen and bathroom, hardwood floors and lots of closets. It also has plenty of windows (a couple with a semi-view of Manhattan and one of the major bridges). It is just steps from the subway and is surrounded by lots of restaurants and shops. For now, I can only have my cat. I say, “for now” because I am being optimistic that I will be able to talk them into letting me bring up Ralphie later since their only concern is for potential noise. (The ad said that small dogs were okay, but that apparently meant under 10 pounds, which my mutant beagle is not.)
So all in all, we totally win. My head has finally stopped spinning from how fast it all worked out so that I am now left only to figure out how to get all my stuff up here from the ol’ STL. And hopefully, next month I will be able to win them over with how attractive my dog is. I mean, could you say “No” to this?:
I do still long for that claw-foot tub though. Oh well – I guess you can’t have it all.
11.11.2007
A Cry for Help
The other day I was catching up on some older episodes of the new Dr. Who, which my aunt and uncle recently got me watching. In this particular episode, the Doctor was reunited with his old companion Sarah Jane Smith who, as it turns out, still has one of the Doctor's most faithful companions, K9. (I've included a picture for those of you not familiar with this hilarious-looking tin robot dog.)
Honestly, he really only barely resembles a dog at all. He is more of a toaster with a vaguely dog-like head attached. And probably the best thing about him (other than the fact that he can shoot lasers) is that he speaks in a total robot voice. So, again, not really dog-like at all. And yet this didn't stop my emotional reaction to the following scene:
K9 tells the Doctor that he is going to sacrifice himself to save them. After arguing with K9 for a moment, the Doctor kneels down by K9 and resignedly says, "You're a good dog," and pats him on his head.
In response K9 wags his antennae "tail", spins his satellite "ears", and says in full-on robot voice, "Affirmative." And I immediately start weeping - yes, weeping - while thinking what a truly good little tin dog he is.
Can you say, ridiculous?
Since I am now back in New York and Ralphie is still in St. Louis, I would like to be able to blame it on the fact that I miss my dog. But I have to admit that I probably would've cried even with Ralphie sitting next to me, because, I mean, K9 really is such a good dog.
11.08.2007
At Least He Stopped Answering his Cellphone During Speeches
All I'm saying is that nothing good can come from this partnership, and I think this picture proves that.
11.01.2007
Better than a Box of Chocolates and a Dozen Roses
Well, it seems that, after all that, Halloween and I have decided to work things out. Granted, things aren't perfect for us. We are still working through the slutty baby costumes, but he gave me these baby costumes, which are the most adorable:
So he won me over, initially, with these cutes, but I was still upset with him for what he did to Harry Potter. Finally, after I gave him the silent treatment for a while, he showed me this:
If I ever do have a child, I would pick a costume like one of these and make he or she wear it continuously until they out grow it. Because, let's be honest, who couldn't love a little wolfette or octababy like these? Halloween also won me over with my own baby cousin's SUPER cute turtle costume, which wasn't the least bit slutty.
So he won me over, initially, with these cutes, but I was still upset with him for what he did to Harry Potter. Finally, after I gave him the silent treatment for a while, he showed me this:
What can I say? He had me at "Baby Hedwig".
Then, on top of all of this Cutesville, Halloween went on to prove that he was willing to go that extra mile to make me happy. Halloween put a real, live owl perched on an one-way sign about 6 feet away for me!! It was freakin' awesome! So right now, he and I are riding a relationship high, but we'll have to see how he handles the other holidays coming up. He tends to be pretty jealous.
Then, on top of all of this Cutesville, Halloween went on to prove that he was willing to go that extra mile to make me happy. Halloween put a real, live owl perched on an one-way sign about 6 feet away for me!! It was freakin' awesome! So right now, he and I are riding a relationship high, but we'll have to see how he handles the other holidays coming up. He tends to be pretty jealous.
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