2.06.2006

I.Am.Doomed.

So my boss has this tendency to send emails every so often entitled "tidbit of the day." These usually consist of goofy pictures of celebrities, weird foreign ads, or sometimes just little quotes. The other day he sent me this link.
At the time, I simply laughed it off as nothing more than a reinforcement of an inside joke. Then came a talk with my mom. I was telling her a story about how I made this joke in an attempt to win over this dude when she puts on the somber voice. "Amanda," she says (and she only ever calls me "Amanda" in solemn times) "I think I should tell you this now before it gets any worse. I heard on NPR yesterday that . . ." (long, pained pause) "men don't find women who are funny, attractive." She goes on to say, in all earnestness, "Maybe you should really think about being serious for awhile."
Wait. What?
"Yeah, maybe you should just try to do some deep thinking or something."
Omigod! Now, I have several passions: the 1950's, art, celeb gossip, my fam, femme fatales, education - but one of the biggest - at least in the past year - has to be comedy. I think funny. I study funny. I practice funny. I write, sleep, and play funny! I even overcome my weird overactive embarrassment problem time and time again just to put myself in awkward situations simply for the sake of comedy.
What a mess.
I guess my love of the funny makes me too masculine and awful for anyone to want to date me.
I suppose I will just find comfort (the comfort that one might get from a supportive partner) in the fact that I have my beagle, my cat, and my sass to keep me warm at night.
Here's hoping that one of them will get me something for Valentine's Day. And all I'm saying is that it better be fucking funny.

6 comments:

Ali said...

That is, by far, THE MOST RETARDED THING I HAVE EVER HEARD.

Sarah Silverman? Funny as fuck, gets laid all the time.

Garofalo? Have you seen her man? Hot.

Kathy Griffin, while no longer married, still funny as hell.

As is Amanda.

April said...

They apparently also don't like ladies who are athletic, tough, smart, round in the hips, etc. But I don't like boys who don't like girls who are athletic, tough, smart, funny, or round in the hips, etc. Oh yeah, I try my darndest to be all of the above and I'm totally married, and get hit on ALL THE TIME.
NPR is officially boring.
(By the way I normally only secretly read your blog, a habit I will recommence once this is posted)

Amanda said...

No - don't go back to secretly reading it. Feel free to comment away!!

Anonymous said...

Excuse me, "try to do some deep thinking or something"...?!

love,
Mom

Brie Johnson said...

Dear Amanda,
I stumbled across your website because I seem to be on it. Don't know you. Never met you. But I'd love to have a chat with your mother about the "I Am Doomed" comment. Has she read about me? Has she seen my picture? Listen up mom, I have to fight them off with a stick! I'm sure your daughter will be just fine.
-Brie Johnson
Comedian

Amanda said...

To Brie,

Well, I don't know about the rest of what you wrote, but you do know me and have even "chatted" with my mom on multiple occassions. We grew up together in Lake St. Louis.

Amanda
Comedy-studier, teacher, and doer for the past 6 years.